Category Archives: Religious Thoughts

Musings on their way to sermonhood

Endurance

Romans 5:1-5
Romans 12:2

As I open the door, I take a deep breath.
Letting it out slowly, I attempt to ease the ever-present ache in my back.
Or was that my neck?
Shaking my head, I start walking.
The day is gray and the snow is melting.
I glare at the sky willing it to action – anything would be better
than this nondescript, indecisive day.
But even if it were sunny,
I would balefully resent its nerve at shining in my eyes.
At least then I could hide my disgust behind sunglasses.
I smile politely at a passing acquaintance.
Snow would be nice.
Maybe its stark, cold sting could freeze the angry, boiling blood
running through my veins.
Why can’t I be happy?

I’m just not used to being here.
It’ll get better.
What if it doesn’t?
There’s always something – some explanation for why
the grief is temporary.
“It’s just a phase; she’ll grow out of it.”
It must be “that time” of the month again.
It’s just difficult making the transition from one place to the next.
What part of life isn’t a transition?
I’d like to know.
Do I ever get to rest and remain the same?

Once you learn something, you are somehow changed by that knowledge.
You learn something new everyday.
The world is shrinking daily, a result of growth and change.
Worlds are colliding, overlapping; the barriers protecting me
from life are disintegrating.
Nothing remains the same except change itself.
Good old reliable change.
How do you find a permanent identity even as you are creating and
editing the original?
People think I’m changing; I feel I’m becoming more me.
Finally things are starting to feel congruent inside.
But that doesn’t lend logic to my actions.
The clouds keep changing form.
That was an elephant, but now it more of a tiara.
The wind shifts again.

Am I changing or am I remaining the same while the world
continues on its axis?
A parallel behind the rest of the world, my movements are slightly
out of sync.
It’s really just a question of inertia.
Objects at rest tend to stay at rest until acted upon to change.
The rest of the world keeps spinning, moving at a frightful speed.
I don’t want to join that dance; I get motion sickness too easily.
The longer I remain inactive, the more pressures close in on me
forcing a change.

Study harder.  Walk faster.  Think seriously.  Find a job.
Pay off your debt.  Trust love. Take chances.  Share the car.
Help your family.  Be positive.  Don’t cause pain.

What about the pain?
Did I cause that?
Any course of action seems wrong in some way.
Either way, I lose.
I can be me or I can answer the world’s call.
Used to be able to do both.
Now a sacrifice is demanded.
Will it be the bishop or the knight?
I can’t stop living.
I refuse to admit defeat.
I endure.

 

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Sermon Postings

I am now in week three of my new “job” as pastor of a small church, and am finding that I love it – more than I even expected.    It’s difficult to believe that they are going to be paying me to research, think, and write about the Bible and get to know and visit people.  Seriously, what could be better?

I am finding, however, that I need a way to kind of keep myself in touch with my voice.  So, I’m planning on posting my sermons and letters here.  I would love your feedback, but mostly I just want to make these thoughts available for everyone (friends, family, anc church members) and use this as a medium to help me evalutate where I am and where I need to head – at least in my writings.

Good-bye Seminary, hello world!

As usual, life is in transition.  I wonder if this continually transitioning life thing is new in history or if we’re just returning to a nomadic period in human history.  Personally, I want to settle.  Not that I ever want to be settled or settle for something “less” than whatever it is I’m pursuing (a life well lived, perhaps?).  I just want some sense of stability for myself and my family.  Anyway, I’m ready to be done with living out of boxes and shuttling between the worlds of my parents and parent-in-laws.  I’m pretty sure my two year old would appreciate his own room.  If ever there was a proponent for stability, structure, and schedules, it’s a two year old kid.  He’s flexible and adjusts quite well to each situation, but his burnout rate is higher.  Anyway, my brain is scattered along with the rest of my life right now, so this should suffice for th time being.  Here’s to yet another new beginning!